In a heartbreaking interview, Aubrey Miles has opened up about how she blamed herself for her youngest child Rocket‘s Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD).

Alongside husband Troy Montero, she talked about their struggles during a recent guesting on Toni Gonzaga’s vlog, revealing the ups and downs that came with their daughter’s condition.

“I have two [older] kids so alam ko yung development ng kids. So, with her, sabi ko parang may iba siya. She doesn’t acknowledge her name. Ayun yung first. When I say ‘Rocket.’ Sige, sabi ko, baka naman sa two [years old]. She doesn’t look,” Aubrey shared.

Recalling the exact moment the doctor told them about Rocket’s autism, the couple shared how painful it felt. “Parang, we got punched kasi it’s official na nga,” says Troy. “Although may feeling na there was really something, but once it’s official, it’s like, ‘Oh, wow! It took us how long for it to sink in.’”

That’s when Aubrey started to get emotional. “You want to blame yung sarili mo kasi as a mom, parang, ‘Ako ba ito?’” shares the actress. “Ako ba ‘yan? What did I do? Yung genes ba namin? Sabi ko, ‘Bakit? Hindi naman ako nag-diet noong time na iyon.’”

Troy further shares, “After the diagnosis, for me, I was thinking, you know, she laughs, she plays with us. She’s still a breath of fresh air. And when you see her, she’s so happy. And I’m, like, if this is autism for us, I’ll be okay with it. She’s happy.”

Teary-eyed, Aubrey added, “I’m crying because we can say it, kasi before parang it was so hard. Sabi ko, ‘Nakakahiya ba yun na baka [kung anong sabihin nila]?’ Now, I’m happy that I’m open and I’m, like, ‘You know what? We can do this.’”